The A to Z of 90’s Premiership Footballers: B is for …

Posted on November 8, 2013


B is for Lars Bohinen

When I was young, we all liked to buy replica football shirts at birthday time. With your birthday money you’d get on the train with your mates, get off at the first stop in Shrewsbury, and have a day of going round the town spending the money. You’d have a McDonalds, obviously. If you had received enough money that year, not only would you buy the shirt of your favourite side but you’d also get a name and number on the back of it. Some boys got ‘Giggs 11’. Others got ‘Cantona 7’. The richer kids got ‘Kanchelskis 14’. Me? There was only one name I wanted on the back of my shirt. ‘Bohinen 22’.

When Lars Bohinen signed for my beloved Blackburn Rovers for £700,000 from Nottingham Forest, I was overjoyed. Until then I’d had to make do with David Batty as a favourite player, and the possibility of upgrading to the admittedly exotic choice of a Norwegian midfielder excited me no end. His time with the mighty Rovers was bitter sweet, but the only taste left in my mouth was that of sweet sweet love. I remember him scoring a blinder against Sheffield Wednesday (outwitting possibly the greatest right back in history, Peter Atherton, in the process) and his place in my heart was cemented. When we sold him to Derby County in 1998 my heart sank, but I knew business came first. We doubled our money after all, and even the sweetest love is best left ended. Lars Bohinen was the Maude to my Harry, except for the death and tendency to steal things.

Not only was he possibly the greatest Norwegian of all time that didn’t wear corpse paint, he was also a political giant. Indeed, he once refused to play for Norway against France in protest against French nuclear testing in the South Pacific. Rebecca West once said that men of today had only opinions instead of convictions. Well Becky, if you search for ‘conviction’ on google, you’ll get yourself a picture of the Vadso Viking, Lars Bohinen.

Posted in: A to Z, Sport